…One Sometimes Finds Strange Coincidences

The blog post I wrote yesterday, and posted earlier today, can, in a way, be summed up by this quote that appeared on my calendar today:

Recognizing and confronting our history is important. Transcending our history is essential. We are not limited by what we have done, or what we have left undone. We are limited only by what we are willing to do.
– George W. Bush

In The Walking of the Path…

In my attempts to de-clutter my e-mail (a monumental undertaking since I’m an e-mail hoarder!), I came across this sage advice. Maybe hoarding e-mail is not so bad after-all…?

A little background. This is part of an e-mail I wrote to a then-pen pal of mine. Most of my life I’ve lived in Michigan. When I wrote this I was in New Jersey. I moved there after I became engaged to a man who lived in New Jersey. I originally met him on an online dating service. I went to visit him and his family in May 2000. He came to visit me and my family in October 2000. That’s when he proposed. I moved to New Jersey in December 2000.

Before I took the leap and got on that plane to move out there, I wrote this poem:

The Road of Life
We all walk down
the road of life
blindly
having faith
that through the
twists and turns
and forks in the road
the path we choose
will lead our souls
to an ultimate happiness
unbounded.

In March 2001, my fiancé broke off the engagement.

This e-mail excerpt was written in June 2001.

The e-mail to my then-pen pal (later we dated some when I got back to Michigan) was an attempt at a “get to know me/my family/where I’m coming from” kinda thing. A previous paragraph expressed the negativity of my family after they learned of our relationship (my then-pen pal was Brazilian-American, but as far as my family was concerned he was a “dirty Mexican” Sigh!). Another paragraph expressed the attempts by my ex to give me dating advice. (Yes, really!)

Here’s the (edited) excerpt:

Before, yes, I was the type to cave in to my family and did what they thought I should do and think. After all, when you get negativity all your life, you think that your feelings and ideas don’t matter. But, getting away from that, and living on my own, and handling xxxx, and the rest on my own gave me a re-newed sense of self-confidence and self-esteem. I took my life into my own hands, and well, I did pretty good, if you look beyond the narrow “xxxx’s a jerk and I was crazy for falling in love with him” thing. (Which I know that most of my family members can’t see past.) xxxx was a means to an end. An end that I can’t get to if the detour didn’t take me away from my family and to New Jersey. I truly believe that. And truly, my heart, God, and my life took me here. It’s not like I’m starving, it’s not like I’m homeless, it’s not like I’m penniless, and I still have a secure job*. Like I’ve been saying all along, I gained much more in the walking of the path, than I would’ve by staying cooped up, miserable and alone, …. And, even if no-one else in my family sees it, I know that I am a better person for all that’s happened and that I shouldn’t be afraid of wisely following my heart.

I was reading in my Oprah Magazine an article that expresses my past year’s life so “right on the nose” so to speak. It’s amazing. It even brings up those people in the author’s life that criticized her for following her heart and taking a risk, and she brings up some pretty good perspective on the matter. She writes:

“Whatever your circumstance, people will start to give you advice as soon as you disturb the status quo. That advice is likely to be bad. It will be bad because they are seeking not to understand and further your calling but to preserve the world as they know it. And yet, in the midst of the shouting and the falling masonry you will know with an unusual quietness that it is happening in the only way that it can, and that whichever way it turns out, no matter what suffering you endure, it will be all right. There in the midst of the cyclone, is the peace that passes understanding.”

She also says that … if you try to tend to your needs, you are looked on as selfish. (That was [a certain family member's] argument for me not moving out here, that I was being selfish). But, I agree with this statement she says: “Far from being a display of selfishness, this is the most compassionate act you can do for anyone: to stand by the truth of your own life and live it as fully and passionately as you are able.”

This is actually the entire poem that she wrote, which brought tears to my eyes, because this literally is my life. And, it began that day that I stepped on the plane for the first time in May 2000:

The Journey by Mary Oliver

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice –
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
“Mend my life!”
each voice cried.
But you didn’t stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.

It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But, little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do –
determined to save
the only life that you could save.

*Thanks to Monique and Arsen for letting me follow my heart!

And, thank you to my friends who stood by me throughout it all!

Recommended Daily Allowance

Perhaps there should be an RDA (recommended daily allowance) of poetry, just as there is an RDA (recommended dietary allowance) for vitamins and minerals? Vitamins and minerals nourish our body. Poetry nourishes our soul.

When power leads men towards arrogance, poetry reminds him of his limitations. When power narrows the areas of man’s concern, poetry reminds him of the richness and diversity of his existence. When power corrupts, poetry cleanses.
– John F. Kennedy

Some in our society may need a higher dose, however.

And Yet…

I pity the man who wants a coat so cheap that the man or woman who produces the cloth will starve in the process.
– Benjamin Harrison (1833-1901)

Our 23rd President, Benjamin Harrison, lived more than 100 years ago. And yet, in 2013, his words, I believe, still resonate with many. Especially in light of the tragedies in Bangladesh from two weeks ago, and from yesterday.

Easter Rebirth

Each year when the crocuses bloom I think back to my full initiation into the Catholic Church at the Easter Vigil in 1997. All adults preparing for initiation into the Catholic Church — converts from other Christian faiths; non-Christian converts; and those who, like me, were baptized Catholic but never had their First Communion nor had been confirmed — must attend R.C.I.A. classes in order to learn about Catholic beliefs and traditions and hopefully, in the process, strengthen their faith and grow close to God.

R.C.I.A. stands for Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults. The classes I attended started in September 1996. In one of those early sessions our catechist gave each of us a crocus bulb and told us to plant it in our garden. It was to be a symbol of us, of our faith. Just as the crocus lies in wait, gathering nourishment from the surrounding soil, until it bursts forth into a new life in Spring, so too would we lie in wait, gathering intellectual and spiritual nourishment through our study, through the support of our classmates, through the prayers of our family and faith community, until the moment of our baptism*, confirmation, and our First Holy Communion when our faith blossoms, we become a new creation, and we are able to experience a closeness with Our Lord as we have never experienced before.

*Only those from the R.C.I.A. class (and those in the equivalent class for children) who have not been baptized into a Christian faith before get baptized at the Easter Vigil. As I reflect on my experience those many years ago, I remember the stirring moment when one of my classmates was baptized. It seemed as though I could see the moment the Holy Spirit came down, just by looking at the expression on the man’s face. I could feel the Holy Spirit there with us. It was a profoundly moving experience! It wasn’t until our class met for one last time a week later that I learned I wasn’t the only one in our class who had the exact same experience at that moment.

A second moving experience that evening, this time all my own, came after I was anointed at my Confirmation. When the priest embraced me it was as if Jesus himself wrapped his arms around me and a heavy burden lifted from me, one that I didn’t realize I was carrying until then.

As I look on the beauty of the crocus, as it blooms this Holy Week, I think about the profound effect my faith in Our Lord has in my life. And I pray that each and every one of His children will feel His presence in their lives, and experience a spiritual rebirth this Easter season.

The Joy of Music

For three years now, ever since I moved to the Lansing, Michigan, area and found out about the Red Cedar Festival of Community Bands, I’ve wanted to attend. The first year, when I mentioned it to my husband, he described it as “garbage”, thereby discouraging me from attending… somewhat. Last year, I again thought of going, but hesitated. Then, this year, I decided that just because he thinks it’s garbage, doesn’t mean that it is. And, since the festival is during the day, I don’t need him to drive me to it.* I put it on my to-do list for Saturday and went. I’m glad that I did. Garbage… not at all. There were 11 bands that played in the festival this year. The format is half-hour concerts by each band, with a 10-minute intermission in between concerts. I sat through three concerts, one each performed by the Meridian Community Band, the Grand Ledge Community Band, and the Downriver Community Band. Being in Meridian Township, it’s the Meridian Community Band that hosts this festival every year, now in its 18th year.

This festival is for anyone who likes to experience a variety of music. Where else can you hear moving pieces of music, a polka, a medley from the movie “The Great Race”, Greek folk music, and much more for free? (Well, donations are always welcome!) Not to mention, the quality of music is quite good. At one point when the Downriver Community Band performed “Promise of Living from Tender Land” by Aaron Copeland, if I didn’t know better, I could swear I was sitting in Orchestra Hall listening to the Detroit Symphony Orchestra.

For me, the best piece of the afternoon, was “Joy in All Things” by Brian Balmages, performed by the Meridian Community Band. I was literally tearing up during the flute solo. No exaggeration! Here’s a video of the piece performed by the California All-State Concert Band. Not as good as a live performance, but hopefully it will give you a taste of what I experienced at the Red Cedar Festival this year. Enjoy!

*For those of my readers who don’t know me personally, I stopped driving at night, unless the trip is short and/or necessary, due to sight issues. Recently, my ophthamologist gave me eye drops to, hopefully, help the problem. I have yet to test them out.

Leadership

If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.

– John Quincy Adams

 

Do our leaders, political or otherwise, live up to this standard? Something to think about…